.006

I am a user, I am an abuser. I use and use and use, because that has become my emotional crutch. For the past 10 months of my life, I have gone through things that no one should ever have to go through, felt pain no one should ever feel, laughed harder then anyone else should ever laugh, cried more than humanly possible, and lost something every day. I started using for excitement, for adventure, now I use because reality sucks and I can't deal with it. The sad thing is, is that I know that it's a problem, I know that I'm masking all the pain, but I have no drive to stop. None. I abuse. I abuse because I miss people, I abuse because the mistakes that I have made, I abuse because there is no one to talk to. I abuse for that one moment of happiness. 

But is it ever really worth it?